Received: from hplms26.hpl.hp.com by opus.hpl.hp.com with SMTP (1.37.109.8/15.5+ECS 3.3+HPL1.1) id AA08991; Sun, 20 Aug 1995 12:28:57 -0700 Return-Path: <luigi@paris.CS.Berkeley.EDU-DeleteThis> Received: from paris.CS.Berkeley.EDU by hplms26.hpl.hp.com with ESMTP ($Revision: 1.36.108.11 $/15.5+ECS 3.3+HPL1.1S) id AA159676999; Sun, 20 Aug 1995 12:30:00 -0700 Received: from paris.CS.Berkeley.EDU (localhost.Berkeley.EDU [127.0.0.1]) by paris.CS.Berkeley.EDU (8.6.11/8.6.9) with ESMTP id MAA13149 for <wind_talk@opus.hpl.hp.com-DeleteThis>; Sun, 20 Aug 1995 12:25:09 -0700 From: Luigi Semenzato <luigi@CS.Berkeley.EDU-DeleteThis> Message-Id: <199508201925.MAA13149@paris.CS.Berkeley.EDU-DeleteThis> To: wind_talk@opus.hpl.hp.com-DeleteThis Subject: fake news and the SFBA newsletter Date: Sun, 20 Aug 1995 12:25:07 -0700
OK folks,
I still have a faint hope that this is an elaborate and quite
effective joke at my expenses.
My copy of the SFBA newsletter, which I got yesterday, contains
a front-page article titled `Salt Ponds Convert to Sailing Sites.'
The article is a fake. I wrote it on 7/1 and sent it to this
mailing list. To give it a modicum of credibility, I pretended
it came from a respectable newspaper (the San Jose Mercury News),
which I don't even read.
If nobody else has seen this in their newsletter, then I have to
bow to a truly splendid joke. However, I doubt I am worthy of
so much attention, not to mention work. If it was indeed sent
to everybody, then I am very sorry.
In the latter case, I can suggest two courses of action to the SFBA:
1. slithering apologies. Here's a suggestion for the wording:
`We are sorry. The article `Salt Ponds etc.' in our August
newsletter was not published in the SJMN, as stated, but it
was a product of the fertile imagination of Luigi Semenzato.
We admit we are complete doofuses for reprinting an article
without first checking its source, and we apologize to all
our members, and in particular to Luigi Semenzato for using
his copyrighted material without permission.'
2. cover up. Here's a follow-up article which will put the
issue to rest.
>From the Union City Gazette, 8/20/1995
Salt Pond Windsurfing Deal Falls Through
Pacific Salt Company's plans for creating a windsurfing mecca at the
mineral evaporation ponds in Union City suffered a major blow today,
as Larry Falk, a researcher at the University of Santa Clara,
published a technical report declaring the ponds `environmentally
unsuitable for high-speed sailing activities.' Falk produced the
report after witnessing Jerome LaBlatte's attempt to break the world
sailing speed record at the site. LaBlatte sailed into a landing
flock of egrets, causing havoc and panic among them. Because of the
stress, the flock apparently moved out of the ponds before they could
feed properly. In a possibly related development, several Napa Valley
wineries have reported to local authorities that a large number of
egrets are eating their grapes.
Martin Fisher of the Pacific Salt Company stated he is `surprised and
disappointed by the finding, especially considering we had financed
Falk's research. Scientists in such positions should be a bit more
sensible about their results.'
Lablatte was also disappointed, but admitted that `it wasn't going to
work anyhow. We windsurfers spend enough time as it is rigging and
unrigging and fixing and cleaning. It certainly doesn't help if you
have to spend an extra hour removing egret guano from your sail.'
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